Have you ever felt true unconditional love for something or someone? Maybe it’s your children, your spouse, or your pets. It’s a boundless feeling that makes you feel like you could, and would, do anything.
I want to introduce a similar concept to you today, one that’s more applicable to business. I call it unconditional belief, and I’ve seen it make all the difference for my clients who work in the coaching industry. Your level of self-belief helps determine your success in business, so it makes sense that we want to cultivate a bottomless belief in our abilities as a coach and CEO.
In this episode, I’ll tell you all about the concept of unconditional belief and how you can start to bring it into your business. I’ll talk about some of the obstacles that get in the way of our self-belief, why we sometimes try to force ourselves to believe things, and I’ll give you an exercise you can try so you can start to develop your unconditional belief.
Welcome to The Life Coach Business Podcast, a show for coaches who are ready to up-level their business and take their impact, leadership, and results to a whole new level. If you’re ready to start taking powerful action and become the leader your business needs in order to grow and thrive, this show is for you. I’m your host, Amanda Karlstad, certified life and business coach, and entrepreneurial leadership expert. Now, let’s get down to business.
Hello and welcome everyone. Thanks for joining me today. I hope you’re all doing well. I am amazing. The show just officially launched and it has been so much fun these last couple of days hearing from so many of you and so many of you reaching out and seeing your reviews, I want to tell you all how much I really appreciate your support. It really does mean a lot and I am so looking forward to bringing you even more content each week through these episodes.
So today’s topic is something that has been on my mind a lot recently and it’s come up interestingly, with a lot of my clients recently as well. And it’s a concept that I came up with a while back that I think you can apply whether you’re building a coaching business or any other type of business for that matter, and just in your life.
And I believe that when you really apply what we’re going to talk about today, it really does have the potential to change everything for you. It really is that powerful. And I love this concept because once you really understand it and I mean really understand it, beyond just an intellectual level, once you really experience this in your life, I believe it really can shift everything. And it can really shift your level of consciousness and shift the possibility of what you open yourself up to with your business.
So for that reason, I think it’s really important to talk about this today and talk about how to really develop this within yourself. And so the concept that I want to talk to you all about today is called unconditional belief. And how I developed this concept was as I was really looking at and observing my most successful clients and also reflecting on my own experience, and looking at really what it takes to be successful in building an online business today, especially in the coaching and consulting industry, I have seen over and over again that what we’re about to talk about can make all of the difference.
And so I know I’ve mentioned this in an earlier podcast but I want you to really consider that we’re living in an amazing time where there has never been a better time or more accessibility when it comes to starting a business, especially if you’re in the online space, if you’re starting an online coaching or consulting business.
And so not only that, but the technology that we have available to us and the demand for the work that we’re doing, it allows us to reach and serve so many people in so many parts of the world. And it’s all a really exciting time and it’s an exciting place to be right now.
And with all of this technology, with all of the social media, with everything around us on any given day, there’s so many opportunities available. And we all have such an opportunity to be able to live our purpose through this work, to really make that positive impact, and to really build a successful business while doing it.
But the truth is despite all of that, there’s also a lot of noise in the industry. And it’s because of the noise that I see a lot of people who have a hard time staying focused and staying clear in their business. And what happens is when you don’t have this clarity, there is a lot of time and energy and money that’s being spent on things that aren’t effectively helping you move forward as quickly as you could be.
And you also feel stuck not creating the level of results you really want in your business. And so I see this as one of the main struggles with newer coaches who are newer entrepreneurs and they’re stepping into this new place but I also see it with more seasoned coaches too. With coaches that are trying to relaunch their business or perhaps even shift the focus in their business, like moving from an offline model to an online model, or changing their niche, changing their programs, their offerings.
And so it’s because of this, I see this happen all of the time and I think this is a really important concept to talk about. One of the reasons why I love this concept so much and I believe in it so wholeheartedly and practice it in my own business is because it really is a game-changer.
And because I have come to know this and I’ve really come to experience this in my own business and know that it’s been one of the determining factors to my success and also to my clients who have come to know it as well, it’s your ability to have unconditional belief.
And as I’ve been talking about in my previous podcast episodes, your level of beliefs determine the level of results you have in your business and in your life. And your beliefs at the end of the day will dictate how successful or unsuccessful you are in business. It really boils down to that.
And so what I love about unconditional belief with this whole concept is that it really requires a whole new level of thinking and emotional management to really believe at a level that’s unconditional. It’s like unconditional love.
Think about in your life when you’ve experienced that. It’s a whole new level of love that you feel and it could be – for some of you it might be with your children, for some of you it might be with your spouse, your soulmate, whoever. But it’s the same concept, right? You learn to love on a whole new level. On a level that’s unconditional.
And it’s the same thing here. And so I believe one of the most important things you can do as a business owner, as someone who is working to grow and scale their business, especially if you’re in the earlier stages of your business is to cultivate an unconditional belief in yourself and what you’re creating in your business.
But the thing with this is that it requires you to think big. And when you’re in these earlier stages of building your business or you’re in a stage where you’re rebuilding your business, you’re relaunching and it feels really tough, really difficult, it’s even more difficult to do because you don’t yet have the evidence and you don’t have the results yet that this whole thing is even going to work out.
And so what happens is there’s a ton of self-doubt that tends to come up when you’re in this stage of business. And if you’re in this stage where you’re trying to transition fully into your business from your day job, maybe from your corporate role or even if you already made that transition but your business isn’t at the level that you want it yet, chances are you’re also going through the inevitable identity crisis that I talked about in episode one, which side note, by the way, if you haven’t listened to, I highly recommend you go back and listen to.
But it’s only through this identity crisis that feels like one of the most difficult things you’ve ever gone through that you reach this next level of success. It’s a requirement. And because you’re going through it, what happens is you spend so much time swinging between what I call forced belief and self-doubt.
And I want to talk for just a minute about this whole concept of what I believe to be forced belief because I think this is really important to recognize too. It’s a very real thing. A forced belief in my experience is a belief that in a lot of cases might have been taken from someone else, or it might have been taken on with not a lot of real consideration or thought or work on how it actually feels.
And so what happens is we don’t end up questioning the thought because maybe we’ve seen that it’s worked for someone else or someone else might have created a certain amount of money that we want with that particular thought, so we assume that it can work for us too. And in some cases, we might be able to get some traction with that thought.
But the problem is that long term, if we’re really trying to force that belief, if we really don’t believe that belief and we’re trying to live and operate from that same belief that doesn’t quite feel authentic or congruent to us, we spend a tremendous amount of time and energy trying to force ourselves to believe something that we ultimately don’t believe.
And that belief, it’s not triggering the type of emotion that effectively serves us in what we’re trying to achieve, and that just doesn’t work. And so I think this is a really important distinction and it’s one of the concepts I’ll be talking about in a future episode. This whole concept and idea of living other people’s thoughts.
But for today, I want to focus on the idea of unconditional belief and why it’s so important to develop this within yourself, especially as you’re growing your business. Because your current level of belief is going to dictate your level of success.
And whenever you’re believing the self-doubt and the old stories you’ve been believing your whole life, these old patterns of thinking, they always end up feeling like fact. And when they feel like fact, we end up believing and accepting them as fact.
And it’s extremely hard to move forward when we’re operating from that place. And so this is why developing unconditional belief is critical. And one of the best byproducts when you develop unconditional belief in yourself and what you’re creating in your business, when you really do the internal work that’s required to develop this within yourself, there’s such a sense of peace that comes through all of this, that comes through this process.
And so all of that old struggle, all of those old feelings, all of that old energy that we spend or have spent trying to force things, it’s almost like it just quietly melts away. And when this happens, you notice quickly that this old pattern of swinging between old stories of self-doubt and into that forced belief that really doesn’t feel authentic and really isn’t supporting you in moving forward, it’s like you move into this total neutral state.
And it’s a whole new sensation. It’s a whole new feeling in your body. And it’s one of the most powerful states you can operate from and it’s also one of the most peaceful states to live in, I might add.
So I know this is going a little deep and because of that, I’ll plan to talk more in detail about this on a future episode. But operating from neutrality is a very powerful place to operate your business from. And I have found it to be an extremely peaceful state as well. And so we’ll dive into that as well in a future episode.
But for now, I want you to understand that with all of this, when you have a big dream for yourself, when you’re really doing the work to cultivate a level of belief that is unconditional and truly authentic, it requires you to believe in yourself in a whole new way.
And in order to do that, you have to generate and connect to so much more of your personal power and your strength in order to really cultivate it. It requires a whole new level of intentionality with yourself and it also requires believing in what is possible and believing in a way that is beyond your current level of programming that’s in your current belief system.
It’s about opening yourself up to the possibility of what doesn’t exist yet. And something that is so much bigger than your current circumstances. And this is the real work, my friends, and it is so, so powerful. And I’ve learned this over the past year with my business and it’s been a total game-changer.
And when I see my clients step into this new level of belief for themselves, it changes the game for them too. But here’s the thing; to get to this level, to get to this level of unconditional belief, this whole process in most cases, it feels awful and it feels extremely hard.
And the reason for this is because it’s challenging your current identity. It’s challenging the person you’ve always been and it’s challenging everything you’ve known. And it’s moving you into this place where there’s nothing. There’s nothing there except for the belief.
There’s no certainty, there’s nothing familiar to hold on to. And it quickly becomes a very vulnerable place. And I watch every one of my clients go through this. So one of the metaphors that I have found to be very useful to describe what’s happening when they’re going through this whole process is to visualize that you’ve just walked into a river.
And so I want you all to imagine this too. And I’m not talking about just dipping your toe in. I want you to visualize that you’ve walked all the way into this river. You’ve walked into this river that’s about three or four feet deep and you’re about halfway to the other side.
And I want you to imagine that you’ve walked into it with a pretty high level of confidence because before you walked in, you looked at the river, you looked at the bank on the other side of it, and you saw that it appeared to be a pretty calm, peaceful, shallow river or stream from the surface.
And so because of that, you thought it was going to be a pretty easy walk to get to the other side. And so I want you to imagine yourself walking into this river, into this stream. And imagine now that you’re about halfway in and your first few steps were pretty easy, but now you’re in the middle of this river and now you’ve realized that you’re in the middle of some pretty strong rapids and you didn’t see them before.
And I want you to imagine what this really feels like. I know most of you have had this physical experience before so I know you understand what this feels like. And so it’s like you’ve walked halfway into this river, you can’t go back, and you don’t want to go back, and you have this beautiful field, this beautiful field of wild flowers and beautiful mountains on the other side of this river once you get to the other side, and you don’t want to go back to where you started.
But the problem is you’re quickly realizing that crossing the river isn’t going to be as easy as you originally thought. And you also see that there’s only one way to get to the other side, and that’s through the rapids that you’re currently in. You know it’s the only way and there’s no going back.
And I want you to picture and feel these rapids and how they’re getting stronger and stronger as you move forward. And so now you’re also realizing that you can’t look back because you know that if you do, chances are, you’re going to lose your footing. And those rapids, they’re going to carry you downstream and you’re not going to be able to find your footing again.
So you know you’ve got to keep focused on the bank, on getting to that other side, and you’ve got to keep stepping forward and exerting all of your strength to keep your footing and to take each step towards that other side. And as you’re doing this, you also have to stay present with taking just one step at a time and carefully feeling and finding your footing across the rocks that you’re stepping on at the bottom of the river, while holding strong against those rapids.
This is the same process of developing unconditional belief. Just as you would carefully take one step at a time and keep your focus on taking just that next step and focusing forward, it’s the same process to cultivate this unconditional belief.
And the fact is that you have to do it because if you don’t, you’re going to get carried away in the rapids and you won’t get to the other side. And it’s the same with your business. If you want to build a successful business, you have to first have clarity on where you’re going. You have to know what you’re working towards. You have to have a compelling vision.
And I’ve talked about this in episode two of this podcast. But on top of all of this, you have to recognize that when you found yourself in the middle of the “rapids,” you have to have the awareness as to what’s coming at you, to what’s occupying your brain, to your current level of belief, and all of those reasons why your brain is delivering to you those narratives on why this isn’t going to work out, why you can’t be successful.
And instead, you have to imprint a new set of beliefs and you have to exert a new level of energy and new level of strength in your intentional thought process that is going to create this new belief system. It literally rewires your brain and it’s going to keep you strong while you’re in the middle of the rapids.
And you have to stay focused on what’s ahead and not spend your time looking back because looking back is only going to get you sidetracked and force you to lose your footing. And if it starts carrying you downstream, down into that thought spiral, it’s either one, going to slow you down, or two, it’s going to carry you downstream completely and take you to somewhere you don’t want to be.
I also want you to understand that wanting to know exactly how you’re going to cross the river, exactly how you’re going to create this seven-figure business, it’s going to keep you sidetracked. And it’s going to prevent you from walking all of the way in. Because it’s just as if you were crossing a river. If you really had to do that, you’d know that all you need to do is just take one step at a time and keep focusing forward.
And so I want you to see that it’s the exact same process with your business. But if you don’t have this unconditional belief in yourself, in what you’re creating, it’s going to keep you on the side of the river. It’s going to keep you where you don’t want to be.
And you’ll keep the same pattern of swinging back and forth from forced belief and self-doubt. And I want you to consider this. Just like if you really had to cross a river, you’d know that if you just took one step at a time, that you’d carefully find your footing with every step that you take. It’s the same thing with your business.
You have to have that same level of unconditional belief, knowing that you’re going to get to the other side, that you can create exactly what you want to create. But you have to be willing to do the work and you have to be willing to walk through.
And you have to be willing to do the work to stay strong and understand that you know how to just take one step at a time. And with each of those steps, you’re going to build that unconditional belief and be even stronger. And at the same time, you’re going to get closer and closer to that other side.
And so because of those rapids, those are like that old identity, those old stories that keep surfacing in new and old ways, and it’s like you move through this shift from who you’ve always been to who you need or you want to be now. This is going to be one of the strongest forces you’re ever going to be up against as you’re up-leveling in your business. Hands down.
Your brain is going to be confused. It’s not going to have the certainty of who you’ve always been, so it’s going to create the rapids. It’s going to try to pull you off course. But in order to move to your next chapter, you’re going to have to walk through. You’re going to have to walk through the rapids and walk through the unfamiliar and go into the unknown.
And know that once you get to the other side, it will be one of the greatest gifts that you’ll ever give yourself. To really unconditionally believe in yourself, to have walked through those rapids, to really make it happen for yourself. There’s a real sense of peace when you do this. A real sense of freedom.
So here’s to developing unconditional belief in yourself and what you’re creating starting today. I hope you all have an amazing week and I’ll talk to you again very soon.
By the way, I want to tell you about something amazing that I’m offering to celebrate the launch of this show. I’m going to be giving away three free VIP strategy sessions where I’ll dive deep into your business and help you put a strategy in place for the next 90 days, so you have a game plan on how to create real results in your business and start gaining momentum.
I’m going to be giving away one free VIP strategy session, the same VIP strategy session I offer to all of my highest level clients to three lucky listeners who subscribe, rate, and review the show on Apple Podcasts. Visit amandakarlstadcoaching.com/podcastlaunch to learn more about the contest and how to enter. I’ll be announcing the winners on the show in an upcoming episode. Thanks so much.
Thank you for listening to this episode of The Life Coach Business Podcast. If you want to learn more about how to build, grow, and scale your business and accelerate your results visit amandakarlstadcoaching.com.